It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Alabama edition of
Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside Alabama.  If you have
one of the Alabama editions, you may need some help understanding the

The Alabama edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen. It
reads "WINDERS 98" with a background picture of the General Lee superimposed
on a Confederate flag.  It is shipped with a Daisy Duke screen saver.  Also
* the Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
* My Computer is called "This Infernal Contraption"
* Dialup Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
* Control Panel is known as the "Dern Dashboard"
* Hard Drive is referred to as "4 wheel drive"
* Floppies are "them little ol' plastic disc thangs".

Other features:  Instead of an error message you get a winder covered with a
garbage bag and duct tape.

New Fangled Definitions:
OK = ats aww-right
cancel = hail no
reset = awa shoot
yes = shore
no = Naaaa
find = hunt-fer it
go to = over yonder
back = back yonder
help = hep me out here
stop = ternit off
start = crank it up
settings = sittins
programs = stuff 'at does stuff
documents = stuff I done did

Also note that winders 98 does not recognize capital letters or Punctuation

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of the
Alabama edition.  You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.

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