RULE #1
Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
All comments become null and void after seven days.

RULE #2
If we say something that can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the
ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other way.

RULE #3
You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done, not
both.

RULE #4
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials
or time-outs.

RULE #5
It is in neither your best interest or ours to make us take those stupid
Cosmo quizzes together.
RULE #6
Christopher Columbus didn't need directions and neither do we.
RULE #7
When turning the wheel and the car is nosing onto the off-ramp, it is
not necessary to say, "This is our exit".
RULE #8
Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women how can we know how pretty
you are?

RULE #9
Women who wear Wonder Bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to
complain about having their boobs stared at.

RULE #10
If you don't want to dress like Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to
act like soap opera guys.

RULE #11
Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
RULE #12
Don't fake it.  We'd rather be ineffective, than deceived.

[an error occurred while processing this directive]