A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while =
he's drinking it the monkey jumps all around all over the place. The =
monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some =
sliced limes and eats them, then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the =
cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table, whole!" says the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the patron. "He eats =
everything in sight, the little bastard. I'll pay for the cue ball and =
stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves.
Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him.  =
He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. =
While the man is drinking his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino =
cherry on the bar.  He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, =
and eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?"  he =
"Now what?" responds the patron.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and =
ate it!" says the barkeep.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the patron. "He still eats =
everything in sight, but ever since he ate that damn cue ball he =
measures everything first!"

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